I know that these memories are the gift life has given me so I'll never for forget it all happened. But sometimes I wish I could give them back so I don't have to remember with them the fact that your gone and it's no longer what it was then.

Love's a slow suicide, one I'd commit for you.

I've said it once, I've said it twice, I've said it a thousand fucking times
That I'm ok, that I'm fine, that it's all just in my mind
But this has got the best of me and I can't seem to sleep
It's not just your alone with me, it's just you'll never leave
I've said it once, I've said it twice, I've said it a thousand fucking times
You said this is suicide, I say this is a war .

In your heart I'll outlive myself.

It's called the boy disease;
When it strikes, no girl knows.
It hits and it hits her hard,
Sweeps her right off her feet.
It flows right through her veins
It's course is straight to the heart

Weird much? Ok so while hunting on World of Warcraft, 2 Horde who could have easily killed me walked up, and ran circles around me. One poked me, saying hi and the other mooed at me. Never have I had that happen before.

Part of me just wants to stand right up and tell Cory exactly how I feel. That I fell head over heels, only for him to hurt me. And that I'm sorry my friendship just doesn't seem to be worth it, when all I did was try and be there for him. Most of all I want to tell him that the worst part is no matter how horrid I may feel, I miss his smile, I miss his hugs, I miss the fun...I just miss Him.

Too say nothing at all would be worse than saying too much.

Hair of fire baby~! Yea I am gonna go red~! Time to change up my hair a bit more than usual, so I'm retiring the black and decided I will be come a red head. Should be freaking ah-mazing.

"To the moss we topple backward, falling gently, head over heels. Mayhap to land so safely on such softness, is the way love truly feels..."

Whether it was night or day,
Honestly I couldn't quite say.
But those simple things I remember;
And I will now unto forever.
There was just you and me,
Together we were truly meant to be.
Your fingertips traced across my skin
Leaving unspoken love letters and sin
Your lips they brushed against mine
Each butterfly kiss now lost in time.

My secret is fatally gorgeous.

If this is my last truth, I must say I love you...

And the house is mine~! Grampa and Fe left for like three weeks. The kicker...I started cleaning my room after they left. And yet when they were here nagging me about it I just left it. But I feel like I've matured a bit by finally cleaning it. I changed stuff on the wall, fixed the obsessive sticky tac and organized a lot. All I have left is to sort through some clothes and do a few last minute touches.

Even though I seriously wanted to go to Freshman this year, and couldn't find a ride...I still had fun. Especially when I kicked my empty Vitamin water bottle and it totally flew in the wrong direction, flying towards some random kids. I swear if I'd kicked it a bit harder it would've hit the one kid in the head. LOL

‎"Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something and has lost something."

- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

He put the stars in the night sky
Wiped every tear from my eye
And I think that maybe I...
Will love him until I die.

Darling you can hide behind that mask,
But never forget it's made of glass
And just as fragile as your heart...
Sweetie she'll tear your charade apart.

Can't wait for Halloween, going to love my costume~! I'm going to be a Nurse to an insane patient aka Miranda who is actually wearing a straight jacket. I'm going to be covered in blood too and have awesome giant syringes. Then I finally found out what little miss bitch face is being, a "fallen" angel...then she gets on everyone's case about originality. Funny how she's the original cunt who took all my ideas and my friends.

You can sugar coat it all you want but it'll still hurt.

You fall too hard, you fall to fast
All silly relationships that never last.

You could give me a million reasons to stay away and still I'd be there by your side.

And we can all feel like we're drowning without the water.

And I will never be you're lover again
As far as I’m concerned, we are not even friends
This may not seem to subtle to you
The point I'm trying to make is we are completely through

I'll bleed my heart out on this paper for you. So you can see what I can't say. ♥

"See me here in the air
Not holding on to anywhere
But holding on so beware
I have secrets I won't share

See me here pushing you
If I then deny I do
Contemplate or wish away
If I ask you not to stay"

It's times like these I wish I could just lay there beside you and forget for a while. Just cuddle up and and lose myself in your warmth. Let the rest of the world fade into the background.

And when it all fades out, your the clarity in my mind.

"It's like he doesn't hear a word I say, so how do I know if I'm on his mind? He makes me wanna pull all my hair out, like he doesn't even care..YOU,ME we're face to face but we don't see eye to eye. Like fire and rain, you can drive me insane, but I can't stay mad at you for anything. We're Venus and Mars, we're like different stars; but your the harmony to every song I sing, and I wouldn't change a thing."

My mind is a battlefield .

Me without you? That's like night without day, completely impossible.

This is heart break,
Did you see it shatter?
I told you it was fragile
Guess it didn't matter.

They call it substance abuse
Always made worse with misuse
Maybe if I take enough
This wouldn't seem so rough
And would temporarily erase
My memories of you, this place
Is this me escape in a pill,
Or something that could kill?

She didn't want to walk away, but you let her go.

Honey, loves a real killer.

Hahaha hello there my rebel angel side. Yesterday I walked out of my last class. Well the teacher sucks anyway, but Zac was just as bored as me and proposed the idea of walking out. I wanted to but the teacher hated me from last year and I was convinced she'd catch me. To prove a point Zac just up and walked out with the teacher like right in front of us, and the idiot never noticed. He made it to his locker, grabbed his stuff, and came back for me. Took a few minutes to convince me and then I grabbed my stuff and walked out with him. We like ran down the hall and upstairs to my locker. Holstrum didn't notice and first and probably never would have if Tarren would have kept his mouth shut. He hollered at me and the teacher tried to come after us and stop us but it was to late and we were probably upstairs.

Someone's a few Crayolas short of a full pack! What are you coloring with?

Wow blow my mind much...in band class yesterday Zac asked me about Cory and if we still hung out. I told him we kinda talked but didn't really hang cause he was with Heather. And then he understood why I was upset an hated Heather. He then said I was prettier than her. I denied it and said no I wasn't that Heather, was prettier, skinnier and smarter. Zac then said that no from a guys perspective I was more beautiful and any guy should see it.

How completely poetically romantic. I cannot believe Jean-Paul said this to me...
"And my love for you burns brighter than the Billions of tiny white points of light that decorate the Night-sky"

Why not look me in the eyes, if your going to tell these lies?
Cause you might as well see what your doing to me...

‎"Before the worst, before we met, before our hearts decide it's time to love again. Before too late, before too long...let's try to take it back before it all went wrong."