She was a dreamer baby, so naive
Went through every day
With her heart on her sleeve

He was a fighter baby, liked it rough
Put on the tough act
Until he fell in love

Is this another dream?
Cause nothing is what it seems.
No one's who their supposed to be,
And you can't even see me.

Sing it to me soft, sing it to me slow
If this is a dream...
Please, don't let me go.

I look into that mirror trying to see,
Where's that girl, the real me?
Maybe she's gone fare from here,
But honestly, I need her near...

The other night Miranda told me she was cutting again, my heart stopped. Last time was bad enough even if it was so little and she stopped when I told her I wasn't mad but disappointed. This time she was scared to tell me but I said I wouldn't be mad. She was scared and said she was sorry if I thought it was some attention thing, but I really don't I told her that. I told her it'd be ok and that she was going to get better, that I would be there for her every step of the way. But I'm scared, what if she finds something else, I can only do so much. Today she gave me a bag filled with pins, needles, safety pins and any other sharp thing she thought she'd cut or has cut herself with. I said I'd be taking anything else she tried to use. And then I asked where she did it, she hadn't a single mark on her wrists. She then pointed to her chest, hips, legs, sides, and stomach.

I want to be that girl you thought about,
The one with that genuine smile
But I'm afraid it won't show,
Only every once in a while

That day I thought it was perfect, I gave you my heart
But that was before the day, you tore it all apart
I should have saw it coming, read each and every sign
It was never real, and you were never even mine

I give thee my heart and soul for all eternity.

I thought it was to be the first,
You said it was but the last.

It is through your eyes that I can see your very soul, for they are the windows that lead straight to your very being.

"I only sleep with people I love, which is why I have insomnia..."

-Emilie Autumn

The newest addition to my family, Little Miss Velveteen, Wabbit. She is the sweetest thing, a Velveteen Mini Rex bunny. And my dearest friend.

‎"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."

- James Baldwin

I was to be granted just one wish
I thought I wanted...
A little more night
Or perhaps a little more rain
But truly all I really needed was,
A little more you.

"A portrait is a terribly false thing, for what shows in a portrait is nothing more than the mask of everything the subject would like the viewer to believe he is."

-Emilie Autumn

Look into my eyes;
Tell me your alive.
Look into my eyes;
Can you hear me, now.

Metaphors, the comparison of two things unalike. Well yesterday Miranda made a metaphor in English class. She said "My best friend is a Panda". Well that got the class laughing and the teacher who had to ask why. Miranda then stated that black and white aka light and dark suited me, and that panda's were the least racist animal, and that I was cuddly like a panda. The teacher then had to ask who her best friend was. And Miranda simply said "Rhianna". I thought it was adorable, because Panda's are in fact my favorite animal.

When you said those words,
My heart stopped
But when all that was left
Was those words hanging in the air
You broke it.

It's baby steps in which I come to accept myself, to stop hating the way I look, and the way I am. But it's moments like these sometimes that hasten the pace of these baby steps...Like the day I went to work and I know very well that I did not happen to look my best, I had make up from the previous night that I had just lightly but not completely washes off, and I had ran a brush through my hair doing nothing more, and I threw on my work clothes. But I was called pretty. A regular customer had her kids and before leaving she said "My kids think your very pretty". Yes it's one simple thing but it made me feel a lot better.